Shit man I haven't been posting much lately.... actually I haven't posted anythingsimo
in quite a while.

anyways I have been a bit out of ideas on what to post. I just don't want to copy paste news from other newspapers i want to post things that will only be read here. unfortunately my brain hasn't been working very great lately. if any of the 2 or 3 readers has any Ideas. or crap that wants posted here, (nothing from another site plz) original stories, funny shit and whatever let me know :D

I'll try to get back on track with the weekly old movie. on monday, and i'll try to think of some other fun crap I can post here to rust your minds.

This Week's ass kicking old movie is for me one of the best movies I've seen. This movie is for me one of the best adaptations of a book. Francis Ford Coppola did a magnificent job with this one, and to be honest I have yet to see something bad by Coppola.
The godfather is one of those flicks that make you say I want more. it has all you need for a balanced breakfast. mafia, guns, girls, more guns, and even a dead horse's head in a bed. at first the movie looks like "I can't expect much from this movie, and then wham! this guy get's shot. you get the whole package with this movie. you also get the acting by Marlon Brando as Don Vito Corleone. for all you young little dudes out there Marlon Brando was one of the best actors from when you were crapping your diaper.

Sorry for the delay with this weeks featured movie but I had been outside the city with no internet.

Every Once in a while a goodt movie is made, but a great movie is kind of rare. Dracula is one of those rare movies. with a great cast, great story, and pretty much great everything.
Dracula is a combination of a love story but with ass kicking horror.Dracula (played by Gary Oldman. not to be confused by Gary Coleman) fights for the church in a crazy war where he kills more people than 5 Rambos put together. when he returns from war he finds out that some asshole shot an arrow with a letter into his wife's bedroom, saying that Dracula had been killed in the war. so the wife seeing that he couldn't live without him. jumped and killed herself. Dracula burst into fury and said some Rumanian shit to god than he stabbed the cross with his sword, blood came out, he drank it, and that's where all hell broke lose.

The Italian Job is an old time classic from 1969 that was so freaking cool that it was remade in 2003. both the 1969 and the 2003 movies are awesome but with enough cool changes to make it worth watching both. if it has ever passed through your head "hey I feel like robbing a ton of money in gold bars" well you better watch this movie to give yourself some ideas. these dudes not only make you laugh with their well thought plans but the movie is chuck full of action.

Their Idea is " dude we need to steal all of this money in gold bars so what do we do?" mini coopers! yes you read correct. they are small, fit almost anywhere, and they look awesome. but it can't all be mini coopers and fun. these dudes decide that if they want to steal this money, they have to stop all the traffic. you know so they don't get chased by those annoying cops that shoot at you.

The old version of the movie is starred by Michael Caine which was like the freaking Robert Deniro of the 70's, and the new one has. Edward Norton which is like the next freaking Robert Deniro. oh yeah and it has the fingerlicking hot Charlize Theron, and other awesome cast.

and Like I already said both movies are totally worth watching. Go watch it now! Capiche!?

Every once in a while disney goes crazy making movies you would never think they are Disney, like pirates of the Caribbean. but way before that, in the technological world, there was TRON. Tron was what we all dreamed of during the Pac-Man years. with digital worlds and crazy colored lights.
Tron is about a hacker/programer/game maker. who tries to prove that the most popular games ever made where made by him. he ventures off into the corporation that stole his ideas, where during a crazy accident gets taken inside the Digital world. there he is forced to battle as a gladiator to survive. but all is not fun deadly battles to avoid deletion. This programmer who is called kevin meets inside with a program who he wrote called TRON. their adventure to go to the mainframe to destroy the master control system is both packed with awesome action and ass kicking effects. (well at least in those times they were ass kicking :p ) so there you have it folks the movie that kicks cybernetic ass.

The good: the movie was a boom douring it's years for the cool concept and the ass kicking motorcycle games which were later made into real games. (you can even find an open source game called armageTRON )

The bad: well I thought the movie was awesome. but still it's more for the young audiences so don't expect gut gushing action.

Why should I watch TRON?: because it kicks ass, that's why!

Where can I get it?: you can rent it, buy it, steal it, download it, digitalize yourself into your xbox and get pwned by a transistor, or what ever the heck you want.

IMDB info: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0084827/

Trailer:

So I'm here once again with the movie of the week which is pretty much all I'm doing in this blog right now. not because of lack of time but because of lack of motivation. hopefully one day I'll have more than 3 visitors.

But enough wining we want the movie!!

here's the cut. you live in a city where the population overpassed it's limit and a pound of meat costs 50 dollars. you might say shit that sounds a lot like what i'm paying for it :P . shit the last time I saw meat in my house was on TV. so any who the thing is there are too many people and too little food. what do you do? call jesus? no, SOYLENT!! soylent comes in several colors and flavors soylent red, soylent yellow, and the most popular kill your neighbor for it, soylent green. when soylent green is all out well there's only that yellow and red stuff no one likes so what do we do? furious stampedes of people demanding food. so what's next? I ain't telling you. if you want to know go watch the movie.
There's a lot more to the movie, but if I tell you i'd be ruining it for you. just go watch it dammit.

The good: cool post apocalyptic storyline.

The bad: the movie is pretty old and the special effects are not too classy.

Reasons to watch it: Soylent green is amongst the best sci-fi movies of the 70's the story is very nice and the idea of eating soylent green makes us ask ourselves that one question. will we ever go too far? I say bring me some soylent green bitches, I'm hungry!


Where can I get it?: you can rent it, borrow it, download it, buy it from the Internet, search in your VCR tapes to see if you have it. wait 10 years to see if you can live it, Or whatever you feel like it.

IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0070723/

Trailer:

So Here's the deal you live in the last city on eart, you have everything you need, and you never have to work. but here comes the bitch part. you might say shit it sounded so good I knew there was a catch, of course there is there's always a catch for everything. free beer? were do I get my nuts... kicked that is. So anyway the catch is that you have this gem on the palm of your hand and when it turns blinking red you get to ride on the carousel, of death! The good part is that you get to live 30 years.
so the story is about this guy called logan 5 (yeah your name has a number) who falls in love with this bitchin girl called jessica 6 so the girl doesn't wanna die at her tender age and decides to make a run for it. so since logan is like some sort of cop he has to chase her ass and if you want to know more you'll have to watch the movie.
So there you have it, this weeks featured movie with all the shit we all like.

The good: Post apocalyptic city some sort of instant booty call cabin (yes you press a button and presto instant booty. I wanna see the jetsons doing that)

The bad: The movie is pretty old so you'll have to bear with the effects.If all you like is some movie with great effects and a porn movie script than this movie is not for you.

Reasons to watch it: The movie has a cool ass Aeon Flux effect to it In fact I'm pretty sure Aeon flux was based on that book (yes there's a book, but in the book you ride the carousel at 21.) The story line is cool and the girl is hot. Just go watch it! or i'll go carousel on your ass.

Where can I get it?: you can rent it, borrow it, download it, buy it from the Internet, search in your VCR tapes to see if you have it. Reenact it with your neighbor Jessica, Or whatever you feel like it.

IMDBinfo: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0074812/

Trailer:

Ok so this week after reading the possible discovery of ice on mars I remembered. shit schwarzenegger did that long time ago in the movie total recall. so then I remembered how freaking cool this movie is and said to myself "myself we should make total recall this weeks movie" so I agreed with myself. Ok so we got this dude played by schwarzenegger (shit that name is hard to type) he has this obsession about mars and keeps on having these wicked dreams. so anyways the dude finds out about this company who does memory implants to make you beleive you actually went there. so the dude decides to go there and that's where all hell breaks loose and shit hits the fan. to make a long story short this dude ends up on mars wearing a fat lady costume. and the rest is pure schwarzenegger action with gunshots, 3 tit hookers and crazy ass midgets. yo get the whole deal. so any who go get this movie and watch it cause those Nasa spacecraft landings on mars will look like shit after schwarzenegger breaks hell loose on mars.


The good: guns, mutants, 4 tit hookers and midgets

The bad: should have had more of the above :p

Reasons to watch it: ok dude if the 4 tit hooker didn't make you want to see it then the guns or the hookers should do the trick. if not then go watch teletubbies or barney and friends cause that's more your style

Where can I get it?: you can rent it, borrow it, download it, have a memory of it implanted into your brain, buy it from the Internet, search in your VCR tapes to see if you have it. Or whatever you feel like it.

IMDB Info :http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0100802/


Trailer:

Yes Charlie Sheen, the dude from the series Two and a half men Stars this bust your gut out of laughter movie. If you like to laugh then this movie is for you. the best thing is that it never gets old. you get everything you need in this movie. thousands shot dead by one guy, girls, and cool movie parody. but this is not like that crap meet the Spartans. hell if you thought meet the Spartans was funny then you need to remove that tumor from your brain. this is classic comedy like only Charlie sheen can bring it to you. Old School way. so there you have it. this weeks featured movie.

The good: lots of laughs.

The bad: since the movie is from the 90's some of the humor might not be understood by younger audiences

Reasons to watch it: shit with all the crap you find in the theaters now a days like Meet the Spartans. I see no reason why not to watch this nice movie.

Where can I get it?: you can rent it, borrow it, download it, summon it, buy it from the Internet, search in your VCR tapes to see if you have it. Or whatever you feel like it.

IMDB Info : http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0107144/


Trailer:

OK so I have decided that every week I will make a review of a classic movie. Why the fuck would I do that? well cause it's old school movies that made us who we are today. Some of them are so awesome we watch them over and over again and never get tired. so every week you will be seeing a dope ass movie from the past. with a very nice review. and a few reasons of why to watch it. so here it goes.

Johnny Mnemonic is an awesome movie that has all the shit we like, brain and body implants, fucked up future, and a crazy Asian guy with a laser thread finger that chops people with a whiplash. what more can we ask for! You want more? I'll give you more. the story is basically this. some crazy dude called johnny is an information smuggler. he has some wicked implant in his brain that allows him to carry a shit load of info. some Asian dudes hire him to carry more than he can handle, but since he's very greedy he takes the job. the fucked up part is that some mafia guys crash the upload party. johnny manages to escape with all the info but the code to extract the info gets messed up in the process. but the bullshit doesn't stop hitting the fan just yet. johnny finds out that if he doesn't get the info out within 24 four hours. he kicks the bucket. oh yeah and the Asian dudes are still after his ass.